To See or Not to See

So last Thursday while I am out to lunch with my sister Susy I get a very distressed phone call from my poor husband. I barely get out a "hello" before Mark starts ranting about getting something in his eye at work and how he's ticked off and can't see and doesn't even know how he's driving right now, etc, etc. I (being the super loving and concerned wife that I am) calmly tell him that if he can't see, then he definitely doesn't need to be on the phone while driving - he needs to go home, flush his eye out with water and call me later (when I'm done having lunch with Susy) if it's not better. He agrees with my sage advice and goes home and flushes his eye out, but he's still in so much pain that he just takes pain meds and falls asleep.

He wakes up around 4pm and feels even worse. So he calls me again and tells me the steps he's taken to no avail, so I tell him he needs to go to the eye doctor. Now perhaps I should have begun this tale by explaining the deathly terror that Mark experiences with anything going near his eyes. He doesn't touch his eye, he doesn't use eye drops, he faints at the sight of contact lenses. (You get the idea.) So naturally he does not want to go to the doctor. I tell him that I'm calling right now to make an appointment and remember how much you liked Dr Uwe Canting when we went last year and you'll be fine and John will drive you and that you're going, the end. (You see how sometimes just having a husband makes you feel like you have kids?) The doctor's office says they can work him in if he comes asap, so John takes my 6'6" baby boy to the doctor.

While I'm closing up at work around 5:30 I get another call from him and he tells me (unusually calmly, I might add) that it turns out he has metal on his iris and it is rusting in his eye and that they have to get the ophthalmologist to come and surgically remove it or it could cause permanent damage and possible blindness. What?! How did this happen? I am a terrible and flippant wife. Although I did convince him to go to the doctor, so maybe I'm not so bad. The doctor told me that if he hadn't gone in that night he probably would've lost his eye completely. And though an eye-patched pirate husband would have been kind of sexy, I am happy that he still has both of those big, beautiful green eyes of his. So after 4 Valium, a blessing, and lots of hand holding the metal was removed, eye drops were administered, and a contact lens band-aid was applied. (I can hardly believe that he survived it all.)

His vision is still pretty blurry in his right eye and the doctor said that it may be 2-4 weeks before his vision goes back to normal. We go back this afternoon for another follow-up appointment and they are hoping that he will be healed enough to remove the contact lens. But I have a feeling that it will take another 4 Valium, a blessing, and lots of hand holding to get that contact lens out!

Holy Trinity?

Another random conversation that I just had to share. This one took place last night while cooking dinner.

Mike: This is almost a mirepoix, we just need celery.

Mark: My family never called it a mirepoix, we always called it the trinity.

Me: Actually I think the trinity is different than a mirepoix. The trinity has green peppers instead of carrots.

Mark: No I think they are the same. Onions, celery, carrots.

Mike: Yeah I think the one with green peppers has a different name and that mirepoix and trinity are the same.

Me: Well if it does I can't think of the other name...

Mike: So Mark if this was The Trinity who would they be?

Mark: Well I think that the Holy Ghost would be onions cause they get all see-through when you cook them.

Mike: OK well what about the other two?

Mark: I guess Jesus would be carrots, cause God is definitely celery.

(Incidentally in case you're wondering I was right - a mirepoix = onions, celery, carrots and the trinity = onions, celery, green peppers.)

I Heart David Tennant

So I've been watching a lot of Doctor Who lately. Specifically David Tennant as the Doctor. And I'm pretty much in love with him. (Sorry Mark, it has to be said.) Doctor Who has been on since 1963, but I started with Season 1 from 2005 with Christopher Eccleston as the Doctor. I've always really liked Christopher Eccleston. In fact secretly I always pictured him as Professor Lupin in Harry Potter and have to admit that I was quite annoyed with who they actually cast. And while we're on the subject of Harry Potter many of you may recognize David Tennant as Barty Crouch Jr from Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. But that's another story.

So if you don't know anything about Doctor Who let me quickly explain that the Doctor is a Time Lord (alien) that travels through time and space in his TARDIS (a spaceship disguised as an old British Police Call Box). Being a Time Lord he is pretty hard to kill. Things that would kill a human, like getting shot in the heart for example, don't kill the Doctor (because incidentally he has two hearts). If something happens that could kill him he is able to regenerate. The only thing is when he regenerates, though he keeps all his memories and is still the Doctor, he looks completely different and has a different personality. (Pretty convenient for recasting and keeping a show airing from the 60s.) Anyway Christopher Eccleston was a great way to start off Doctor Who for me and I was really getting sad the closer I got to the end of his episodes. Even though my brothers kept telling me how amazing David Tennant was, I was certain that I would miss my first Doctor and that no one could ever compare.... But then there was David Tennant! And oh how he won our hearts! (And I do not say "our hearts" lightly - I promise that he has won many a heart as the Doctor- just look him up.)

But I am saddened once again (even more so this time) because alas David Tennant is done and a new Doctor is coming in the next episode. It airs this Saturday on BBC America and I am excited and distressed all at once. So the countdown to Saturday has begun... (As a side note is it completely terrible that we just had Christmas and this week is New Years and my 4th Anniversary and all I can think about is Doctor Who?? What does this say about me...?)

Mormon Christmas Song

A little Christmas Carol from Conan & Max

Do You See What I See?

While Michael is living with us he's been sharing a bedroom with Abby and this is what he wakes up to every morning.

There's a Fungus Among Us...

...Well maybe not a fungus, but definitely an allergic reaction to something! You see I cut my thumb on a broken plate a week ago Saturday. It was just a sliver of a cute - really nothing more than a glorified paper cut. I was very good and immediately washed it and put neosporin and a band-aid on it. (Mom taught me well.) But by Sunday it was itching, by Monday it was swollen, and by Tuesday night it hurt like crazy, itched, was covered in tiny blisters, and turning purplish-black. Throughout all this I was fastidious about washing it with anti-bacterial soap and regularly changing my band-aid with fresh dousings of nesporin, but to no avail. So Wednesday morning I went to the doctor. He said that it was a severe allergic reaction. And based on the level of reaction he believed that I was have a triple allergic reaction to: something on the broken plate, and that's right, you guessed it - the neosporin and the band-aid! All that time I thought I was doing good, but in fact I was making it worse. His instructions were to take copious amounts of benadryl, wash it with cool water and no soap (see even the soap was bad!), apply a prescription of steroid cream 3 times a day and keep it covered. (But naturally not with a band-aid). About three years ago I learned that I'm allergic to latex - but it's a new enough allergy that I always forget. And I've been using band-aids my whole life with no reaction. But apparently this time there were enough allergens going on that the amount of latex in the band-aid only added to my problems. So in the future only latex-free band-aids and no more neosporin, only bacitracin. Go figure...

The first two pictures were taken last Thursday. And if you can believe this, the pictures actually don't do it justice. It looks much worse in person. You can ask anyone.

And this was taken today. It still looks pretty crazy, but surprisingly feels much better and is also less swollen... So that's nice.

Adventures of a New Couch

Not long after John and family moved in, our couch broke. It was on it's way out and so having 3-4 people regularly sitting on it at a time officially killed it. So I found a new one on Craigs List and it was just what I wanted. Plus it was only $30! I mean I've seen couches in terrible shape for $100 on Craigs List so you can imagine my joy when this lovely plumness was only $30.

And you may think, "but Heather you have a blue recliner and a red lumpy sack, why would you buy a plum couch?" And my answer is, because it's awesome. Besides if the recliner and the lumpy sack had a baby it would totally be the color of the couch, so you see it's a furniture family I've got here.

Anyway the point is the lovely plumness came from a cat home. And sadly John and myself are incredibly allergic to cats. So we put it in the garage and Mark vacuumed the crazy out of it before bringing it into the house. But that wasn't quite enough. Because before long there was sneezing and itchy, watery eyes, etc. We ended up renting a rug doctor and now it is perfect. But before the rug doctor did her magic, when John was dying a particular allergy death, I suggested he do a neti pot. The only problem being that we don't own a neti pot and it was Sunday so we couldn't go buy one. So Michael and I helped him make a homemade version out of a salad dressing carafe (a clean one, of course). We ground up kosher salt in the spice grinder until it was a powder and shook it up in the carafe with warm water. The water was a bit too hot when John started, so he popped the top off and added some ice cubes, then resumed the neti pot. It worked great - but I am sad to say that I have no photos, so you will just have to use your imagination. Watching him put that carafe up his nose, with ice cubes tinkling against the glass will forever be emblazoned on my mind, and most definitely prevent me from ever using that carafe for italian dressing again.